Pain is good

Why do we like to hurt ourselves?

I was walking to work.. and a lady lit up a cigarette in front of me-- and starting her puffing of her cigarette as she was walking-- and then I noticed she had a pack of Orbit chewing gum in her other hand.

Now.

I could be assuming-- but I believe she will chew that gum after she finishes her cigarette-- which means she knows her breath will smell.. so why have such a habit that will cause your breath to smell?
My thought for the rest of my walk to work was.. 'Why do we do these things?'

She's already doing a habit that is harming her on the inside.. she knows she'll smell.. but she's continuing to do it? Why do we like to hurt ourselves?

Why do we like to keep people around that constantly use us? Why do we like to keep people around that aren't necessarily benefiting us, but we allow them to hang around? Why do we allow people to make us feel in a way, but they say that they love us, and they only have our best interests at heart?

Why do we do it?

Do we like to feel pain? Do we like to hurt ourselves, all in the name of love? And love doesn't have to be just the sexual kind-- the kind of love you have between your parents, your friends, anyone.

I was literally asking myself those questions, and then evaluating my own self.

There's so many reasons why we do such things..

The main one being fear. We're afraid to lose people that we've known for so long, because we think that we can never get those kind of people again-- or if we lose those people, we'll wonder, who do we have left?

When it comes to those kinds of habits like the one I mentioned earlier-- it's a comfort thing. We don't want to stop because we know once we do it, we will get that same buzz or high, and for a little while everything is ok.

We're so layered as human beings, and we do so many things to mask how we truly feel.

I'm in those kinds of moods today. And I guess because it's a dreary day as well..

Hm..
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