I'm not understanding this...

So after 5 years..

I'm really sad this year.. in regards to my mother.

I'm not understanding this? The years have flown by, and I know my mother has passed and what not-- but why am I feeling it now?

I felt down on Mother's day... and we're in April, I feel more down.. it's not down as in depressed, but there is a twitch in my heart feeling the absence of no mother.

I have a spiritual mother and I thank God for that, but no one can replace my mother.

Lord, I don't know what this is, but please let me have peace. It's weird that after all of these years I'm JUST feeling like this--

I can't really comprehend.. it's sadness and emptiness and feeling lost.

When I hear the complaints of the people around me about their parents and how they hate their mother's and how they wish they would die, and what not-- Well, my mother IS dead, and I didn't wish for that. Yeah.. we all have our moments where we had an argument with our parents or they said something that we didn't want to hear, but needed to hear.. and we didn't like it.. we say all kinds of things.

But the truth of the matter is, at least you have your parents there. At least you have guidance. At least you have a mother to go to when no one else can understand you..

Seeing all of those mother's day statuses and pictures on FB.. I was just.. empty.

But it's life.. I know I'm meant to be strong, and I know where my life is headed.. I know there are so many people that will need my support, and by this experience, I will be able to help all of those people..

Didn't mean for such a melancholic kind of mood.. but this is what a blog is for ya see!

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