Living with a newborn: Multiple Blessings

So today was a big day for my little one... He had his first set of immunisations.
One thing about being a parent; even if you are scared.. You have to not let it show to your children. They know.
I wasn't scared but I just didn't want him to feel pain-- and the needles that were used were absolutely HUGE; and he had to have three of them go in his tiny legs.
Aww my boy! I really felt for him.. But I just consoled him and cuddled him and moments later he fell asleep.
Even when I got home he was still sleeping.
I've just been spoiling him with kisses and cuddles-- he's a little fussy but still in good spirits. Unfortunately he has to do it all again in 4 weeks *cries*

One thing I've noticed about being a mom.. I have received so many gifts for Jeremiah and the exact time I need it. Today for example I received a little gift box with a sleeveless vest, booties and a hat. I was just saying that I needed to get him a new hat.. And voila!
The little blessings really count and I'm grateful to God for each person that thinks to get Jeremiah something.

It's quite amazing when I think back. I don't know how I can extend my gratefulness.

Now back to attending to my J :) x

Living with a newborn: Intuition

I'm sure God deposits something in all mothers in regards to their children.. So they can tend to their specific needs.
Through the night my darling boy has been a bit fussy with sleep.
I noticed that he sounded a bit snuffly.. His nose was bunged up with snot so I cleared it out for him and he fell asleep.
Funnily enough while he was asleep (I don't fall asleep straight away) I read an article on 'Ways to get your baby to sleep better' and one of the ways was to clean baby's nose; when they're snuffly they struggle to doze off to sleep.

Imagine.

He then woke up a little restless and wriggly.. So I decided to take him downstairs to calm him down. The room was a little warm, while downstairs was a little cooler. As soon as I sat with him downstairs and held him he started to nod off to sleep.

He's currently sleeping on my chest because that's where he seems most comfortable for now. He can sleep in his crib but it seems that's not his place of choice today!
This won't become a habit... Routine's have yet to be put in place..

But it's definitely important to be in tune with your intuition... It's always right.

Living with a newborn: Daily balances of life

As i'm writing this Jeremiah (my son) is sleeping.
When I was pregnant, I wondered how I would balance writing as well as everything else.. Because having a baby is no easy feat! It's a very huge responsibility.
I believe I have been blessed.. My baby is yet to be a handful.. He is a very chilled baby once he's had the basics.. Clean bottom, full belly, comfortable clothes etc.
Once in a while he gets fussy but that's baby for you.

The only time you really have time to yourself is when baby is off in dreamland. You can get the washing done, reading done, have conversations with the other half (well... You can do this when baby is up but you have no distractions when baby's sleeping) and for me personally this is my time to get my writing done!

You start to become more confident as your baby gets older.. I will be totally honest I was a little wobbly at the start and slightly doubted myself.. But so many people kept telling me that I would be a good mum so I encouraged myself with that and here I am!
Do not use the excuse that you have a baby so you can't do something.
All things are possible.

Living with a newborn: Heightened maternal instincts

It is currently 5:23 in the morning and I had to just attend to my wailing 2 month old who I mistakenly woke up.
I was feeding him.. And he fell asleep. (Babies get drunk off breast milk lol)
I wanted to change him so that he would feel more comfortable-- which was a mistake-- he woke up upset and started crying up a storm for what felt like half an hour but was only a couple of minutes! The other half wasn't impressed but also needs to understand crying is the only form of communication that babies have at this age.
My heart literally melted. I felt so bad. I disturbed his breast milk drunken sleep. It reminded me of the episode of Friends when Rachel had her baby and woke her up and couldn't get her back to sleep.

After all of the 'shhh's' and rocking back and forth he dozed back off to sleep.
Knowing how my son is.. It was more than likely he was going to wake up again to feed.
In the space of about 10 minutes he woke up again for a feed!
I fed him.. And off to sleep he went again.

My son wakes up around 6; he is an earlybird-- not entirely sure if that will change in the coming months-- but my sleep is done with until later on in the day because he will wake up very soon. Lol

I already have a very good intuition... But with having this baby I have really been following on instinct and I have yet to be wrong.. It must be something that comes with being a mother. You get a very strong vibe when it comes to your child and when you go with it you will see that the vibe you got was accurate.
It can be from baby's clothes.. If they're comfortable.. If they don't like something..

It's quite cool if you ask me. Lol

Now.. Back to my youtube videos. :)

Living with a newborn: 2 months and the continuous battle for sleep

So today. I have had 3 hours sleep.
This is a regular occurence.. Mind you some days are better than others. But today has been particularly challenging. J woke up for a feed and was awake until around 10 this morning.
He would fall asleep in bouts of 10-15 minutes and wake up again.
Today he was particularly fussy due to tiredness.
But through extensive google research(yes.. Google is my best friend) my baby boy is currently going through a growth spurt!
He meets all of the criteria.. Eating more, fussy, up most of the night...
Thankfully it doesn't last long.. And all it means is that he is growing, which is a very reassuring thing.

More experiences to come :)

Living with a newborn: 2 months old

First of all.. Thank you Lord for my son reaching 2 months old.
He is growing beautifully and I can only thank God that he is keeping him and protecting him.

Raising a newborn is not easy! But it is totally worth it. In these past two months I have learnt a lot about myself and my son.
You begin to distinguish the real cries from the fake; the cries that mean hungry, tired, bored etc-- you start to see the personality of the child unfolding before your very eyes.
It is such a beautiful thing to witness.
In particular for me.. The struggle at the moment is getting him to sleep. He loves to battle with going to sleep. It is absolute madness. I will never understand why babies fight sleep so hard!
But what i have seen is my patience has now become a lot because babies learn gradually.
I'm seeing that my son is very happy and smiley when he doesn't need anything and i am so grateful. He's very observant and looks like he likes very colourful things.

It causes me to reflect back to the time I was having him and all I wanted to do was see his face-- so many thoughts ran through my mind when I held him for the first time... Will I be a good mum? How am I going to raise him?
But it's been 2 months already and he has changed so much.
There were so many positive declarations I made about him when he was still in my tummy that I am beginning to see.
I'm learning about myself.. When it comes to raising a baby you really have to sacrifice and put the child first. It is no longer just about yourself.

I can only pray that God will continue to protect him and keep him.

More will unfold in the coming months.. :)

What they don't tell you about pregnancy...

Just over a month post partum-- I'm reflecting on the time that I was pregnant-- and when there were magical moments and times that made me swoon-- there were also times that made me cringe and say 'sorry' repeatedly!

We always hear how when we are pregnant we get a 'glow' and we must embrace our bumps and all of these lovely things-- but there are also some funny and embarrassing sides to being pregnant-- but what you need to know is it's all part of the experience and what makes it so unique to every individual.

The Pregnancy 'glow'
To be honest... I felt like when I was pregnant.. the 'glow' everyone was speaking about was just a sheet of sweat for me. Obviously, when you are pregnant you are carrying an extra person inside of you-- so no doubt you will definitely perspire more.

Uncontrollable gas
Oh my goodness gracious--- sometimes you can just be walking and without even realising you've let out a big one and there was absolutely no way to control it. You could be sitting down quietly and all of a sudden, it's happened again. It's not a pretty part of pregnancy but it's all due to all the lovely hormones bouncing around in your body as well as another human relaxing on some vital organ.

Stress Incontinence
With being pregnant, a lot of the time they recommend that you exercise your pelvic floor muscles-- because this muscle in particular is under the most stress during labour-- and the only way to strengthen it is by doing these exercises. During pregnancy though--- it is most likely-- again not against your will that a little wee can come loose when you sneeze or cough.
Oh the joys!

Extreme Fatigue
This was my ONLY symptom throughout my pregnancy... and as much as it doesn't sound like much-- it can get to a point where all you are doing IS sleeping-- sometimes you can sleep for the whole day into the next. It's crazy how much energy it takes to grow another human being-- sometimes the tiredness can strike you so hard! You don't realize how tired you are until you literally pause. But it's always good to rest I guess.

Swollen Ankles.... and everything else
Unfortunately.... things do swell when you are pregnant. Everyone's bodies deal with pregnancy differently-- some get swollen ankles, some get swollen hands, feet, fingers (my fingers got swollen towards the end!) some people's noses even swell up-- yeah... such a beautiful thing.

Regardless of it all... pregnancy definitely shows you how strong women are... and we are amazing... we can grow human beings. :)

Motherhood

As I stare at this little bundle of joy.. I know God's plan for my life is continuing to unfold and will only get better.

I am a mother.
At 28 years old-- I would have never imagined that I would have a child-- it was a desire that I had, but it wasn't something that I was focused on.
But God being God.. and his humour-- I was blessed with a child and endured the 9 months of pregnancy.

Everyone has their own experience with pregnancy-- But God has been so good to me. My pregnancy wasn't too difficult and there were no complications until the very end-- but even the 'complications' weren't complications!
My bundle of joy came at 39 weeks, healthy and happy.

But now the real journey begins-- learning and knowing how to raise this child!
I'm learning new things everyday-- and as much as this is a new experience for me-- I'm taking it all in my stride.
--------------------------

On the 15th of October 2016-- a gift that I never thought would be given to me; was placed in my hands, crying, with his big eyes looking directly into mine. Head full of hair, skin as light as mine-- and so beautiful. I couldn't believe that I had him growing inside of me all of this time-- the little kicks, the hiccups, my belly slowly expanding to accommodate for his size. I didn't get the typical pregnancy symptoms that everyone is familiar with-- call me lucky lol

What an experience!

From my first scan I was dying to know what he would look like-- would he have a lot of hair? Who would he resemble? Whose nose would he have? What colour eyes would he have? Even the day I found out he was a 'he' was another day of joy for me.
Throughout the 9 months it didn't come into my mind that there is a little person that will be coming out of me-- it doesn't really enter your mind until closer to the time-- but rather you're literally focusing on bonding with the life that is growing inside of you.
It's amazing how much love resonates within you with someone that you have yet to meet. You sit there in amazement as how much you cannot wait to meet this small person and see their little hands and their little feet... it's such a beautiful feeling.

The moment he came out of me and was placed on my chest, him wiggling his legs and feet, getting used to my smell-- I stroked his arms and his little fingers-- so delicate and tiny-- his little rhythmic crying-- getting used to the world outside of the womb...

It's all very surreal.
A lot of people told me that I will be a good mother-- I look at his little face... and a little smile creeps up on his face-- looking so happy-- I pray to God I will be a good mother to this gift from God.

It's all very surreal-- this is my phrase because I just can't believe it. But God knows why he has given him to me to take care of--- he knows I am capable and I can only pray for his strength and guidance.

Motherhood isn't easy-- but it's worth every single moment.

Inspiration

Well!

My writer's block has kicked to the curb finally! I have honestly had the toughest time with writer's block. To be quite frank, it's been the crappiest couple of months for me creatively.

I don't know what caused such a stint... but I'm glad it's gone.

Do you know what inspired me? A story I read entitled 'Imani'-- it was written by one of my little sister's in Christ and it is such a beautiful story. She asked me to proofread it for her-- she's someone who had to learn English, but you can see the gift of writing is within her.
You see it really doesn't matter if English isn't your strongest, or you're illiterate, or whatever the case maybe-- the gift that has been given to you will still show forth!

It's beautiful.

I proofread it and I immediately felt to write something that I was a little scared to.. most of the time I loosely-- very loosely base some of my stories on myself or a particular feeling I feel at that point in time and it's such a release.

Writing is a beautiful art-- having writer's block almost made me forget how therapeutic and how freeing it can be.

I'm hoping it is gone for good-- I have so many other things to write.

It's the new year, 2016!

I refrained from posting here around the Christmas period because I was still in a reflective state of mind.

All that I have noticed is that particular things in my life are moving VERY VERY fast and I am so not comfortable with it.

But... I've also realized comfort is my biggest weakness. Being comfortable, being and feeling ok in one place... it's not good for me.. or anyone for that matter.

How do you grow? How do you progress to the next level? 

In life we need to constantly be MOVING and EVOLVING.. but that can't be done unless we push ourselves out of that comfort bubble.

This is one of my tasks this year-- to actually come out of that comfort zone. I seemed to have done a very impeccable job of convincing myself that I have come out.. but I really haven't.

Or more like.. it takes a lot of time before I decide I want to come out.

Help me Lord with this! 

I love feeling comfortable-- you know when you are in a spot in your bed where you do not want to move because you are so comfortable-- it's warm, it's cosy, and you just don't want to move!

This is the worst thing you could ever find yourself in, in life.

Nothing grows there. Nothing moves. You always stay in the same place when you are in your desired comfort zone.

But yeah... January is always a reflective month for me-- and there are so many things that I am going to do and implement..

With the STRENGTH of God.

Whoo help me Jesus.

x