Christmas Eve!

I'm not really that excited for Christmas this year...

I'm looking forward to the new year more and getting what I need to get done.

It's time to move to the next level... we're not all getting younger... time is moving and things are going on we need to get ourselves somewhere!

Just been really contemplating about things--this week until the new year is like a time of contemplation for me.

But regardless... I thank God I am able to see this time and I thank him in advance for what he is about to do.

God bless
x

Selfishness

I'm a really selfish person.

Yeah, I do nice things, but at the end of it all, it all toils down back to one person-and that is myself.
We always want things, we always ask for things, and when we don't get them, we moan and complain.


There was a statement I heard today at church about how we look at where we're at now, and if we ask for anything from God, and don't get it, we immediately think there is no God-- yet we don't think about what the future holds.
And it's so true... we're so encapsulated with what's happening now--the situation that is happening now, rather than thinking ahead to where we are going to be.

I'm just sitting here thinking my head out about so many things.

God will help me.

x

One of those days...

So much for posting that blog--i've even forgot what the topic was!

Just been in a really pensive state today thinking about a variety of things, but just mainly thinking about the fact 2012 will be here very VERY soon.

Asking those questions.. what have I accomplished this year? I haven't really done anything that I can say 'Yes, I accomplished this'

Next week, I really want to sit down and start planning stuff I need to do for the forthcoming year. Time is ticking. Not saying I'm rushing, but I need to start making movements and setting milestones for myself.

I can't just be here idle and not do anything.. God has something for me to do.. but until I make a move, it won't get done.

*sigh*

God bless
x

The realisation of it all..

That the year will be finished in about 3 weeks.. and I'm going to be 24 next year!

*gasp*

But... this entire year just has gone too quickly-- is it me or does every year seem to zoom by faster?

Anyway... again, I know I haven't blogged for a while... I really need to set my priorities straight again because I was having a talk with my brother and I outlined that I'm getting really lazy, because when I come home from work I don't feel like doing anything but sleeping..

But in order to play hard, you need to work hard too right?
And generally as woman, there are things we need to polish up.. and I'm at that stage now.

Gotta stop being lazy!

I also feel like my communication with God is running dry as well.. like it's starting to diminish.. that has to be sorted out asap. I can't be having that.

I'm going to strive to blog again later because there is something I have been thinking about...

Till later,
x

The ways of the mind

I'm going to go at a different angle here and raise up something.

Our minds are very powerful and I don't think we know how powerful it actually is. It's a scary thought.

Take a look at the film in Inception: the primary basis of the film is about dreams.. about our subconscious mind. Regardless, it is our mind, and look at what we can create even while we are alseep-- so what about when we are awake?

If we could use the full potential of our minds, this world would be something else, I would have say.
Why I'm saying this is because when you think or reflect or meditate, or whatever you do when you hear a good word or you hear something negative or whatever, you start to formulate ideas in your mind, or you start to think and analyse things in your head--things that may have not been mentioned we are thinking about them and working out every scenario that could possibly be done in our minds.

Yet, they haven't happened, or even been mentioned.

Crazy, right?

It's not crazy.. it's reality.

A lot of what we conjure up in our heads have--or never will happen, but we imagine them to be. That's why there is something called imagination. What's the basis of the word imagination? Imagine.

If you start to imagine things negatively, this is how you drive yourself to paranoia, to madness, to all of those mental illnesses that they like to diagnose people with. I don't think it's medicines, it's our own selves overly thinking about unnecessary things that have been said, and we end up driving ourselves mad--literally.

That's why it's always good to stick to the positive route--no doubt there are going to be negative circumstances that arise, but it doesn't mean you should dwell in them.

The ways of the mind are something..

#justathought

A quick prayer

My Lord and my king I give you glory,

I thank you for all of the things you have done for me. I thank you for the people that you have surrounded me with. I thank you for strength. I thank you for guidance. I thank you for sustaining ME.

My Lord continue to have your way in my life, and continue to use me for your glory.. Whatever the purpose you have for me may be, may you use me for it to come to pass.

My God.. I thank you and I pray that you will take your seat in my life always...

Amen.

Near to Christmas

My God.

Cannot believe it.. in a few weeks it will be Christmas--and the the new year!

This year has flown by. As all the other years that have passed.

It's amazing.

But really.. it makes me think so hard, that I really need to buckle down and start on what I wanna do in life!
The way the days are passing.. the minutes are passing.. the hours are passing.. the seconds are passing.. if we just sit on our backsides and do nothing, time will pass and when it's too late we will say 'I haven't done anything'

My life needs a turn around right about now because I feel so boxed and doing routine work. I want to make a change, I want to leave something behind.

I was thinking to myself the other day that when I die.. what will people have to say about me? Will it be good or will it be bad? Will it be inspiring or will it be just anything?

In this world, you need to leave your mark, so you know you've accomplished something.. and that's what I wanna do.

Now.. it's just HOW to do that... that's what I'm working on. And that's what we call life.

God bless.

Thankful

I know I haven't blogged in a bit..

I know.. *tear*

So much has been happening, and I know God is working.

We all have our beliefs; I believe in Jesus Christ, and what he can do is amazing.

I am forever grateful.

x

All part of the plan...

God is something else.

Recently, I bumped into a friend from college while I was going to church, and he was with is girlfriend. When he introduced me to her, she was like 'I need to hug you, I've heard so much about you'

I was like.. huh?! What could he have possibly said to make her react like that? What have I even done?

I was truly shocked, but I was humbled because someone talking about me in a positive light is amazing. It just tells me that I need to continue.

Little thing like really make me think...

Do not be comfortable

In life, you have to always challenge yourself.

Me personally, I like being in a place where I'm comfortable, but when we always stay in a place where we're comfortable, we do not progress.

Think about it.. if you were in a position where you knew everything you're meant to do, and you always do the same routine, are you going to go anywhere? No. You're going to stay in the same place until you make a DECISION!

We need to get to new levels in life.. when someone is climbing a mountain... and they get higher and higher, it gets tough, but they can't turn around and go 'I want to go back' they need to go to the top..

#justathought

God bless
x

Let this day pass away..

Today has been rubbish.

But while the day has been going on, I've been reflecting on everything, and this thought came to me: before something can get good, it has to be bad first. When everything is ok and level, there's no impact, you don't really think anything special has happened, but when you start with a rough day, and it eventually starts rising up.. it's like 'Wow'.

If that made any sense to you, Thank God. But I know what I mean!

But then, God has predestined every day before we were even born...? So, that means he had it written that everything that happened today was meant to happen.

Hm... maybe I was meant to learn something..

I've just been in a sombre/annoyed/don't want to communicate mood.. but I'm asking God to help me.. I don't like being in this kind of mood.

God is in control anyway..

x

A time for me

I know I haven't blogged in a while! Was doing a lot of things and preparing myself to go back to work and blah blah, yadda yadda..

But while on my holiday and even now, I've been in a consistent time of reflection about myself and if I'm being true to myself and to God.

Now.. what I mean by that is.. you can be a complete believer in God.. but you could still be working against him or doing things he doesn't agree of unknowingly.

I was watching this video on Youtube about Blair Wingo, she's a poet, and she uses her gift to speak the realities of God. I watched her interview on how she became born again and she was saying on how she knew about God and everything, but she was playing a 'role' she didn't truly know God until one day when she heard a word, and she gave her life to God properly.

Now.

What this made me think is, am I truly in it for God, or am I just believing in God because he can do something for me? Sometimes, I sit and think about my life now, and I really marvel and sit amazed at who I am now; because I also knew God too.. But I feel within myself, this is where I belong--with God. I think about if I didn't have him, where in the world would I even be? Especially with losing my mother 2 years ago.

But... I can definitely say that my life is in God's hands. I live everyday as it comes and depend on God.. because I don't have anything or anyone else..

Just like in life.. we can easily lie to ourselves or we could live a lie...

It's just good to sit down and reflect about yourself..

#thought

God bless
x

A revelation

I posted something on my facebook:

John 3:6
"Humans can reproduce human life but the holy spirit gives birth to spiritual life"

Does that speak out to you?

This is what I get:
Flesh understands flesh.. and spirit understands spirit. If you want to understand the spiritual side of life, you need the holy spirit. You need the spirit of God to continuous and flowing with no limits in you.
If you're in the world and you're only operating in flesh.. you will understand with no problems, because we're all human.. but we're not just flesh, we're also spirit too.

There's a quote that I will love forever because there is too much truth in it:
'We are spiritual beings having a human experience'

But because we are too much on the human aspect of things, we will not recognise the things of the spirit.
Also that scripture just tells me there's more to life than just living life aimlessly- waking up, going to work, eating, sleeping... there's a lot more, but it's your choice to accept the holy spirit, allow it to dwell in your life, and let it work in you.

Sometimes ignorance is bliss, but it's better to have knowledge of particular things. It can save you.

#thinkaboutit

God bless x

Thought spam of many..

I'm definitely going to have a lot of these..

But, I was just thinking.

Isn't it annoying as children of God, as believers in Christ to still be stuck in the same problems?

Seriously.

You're praying to God to do a new thing in your life, but the prayer is yet to be answered. It's not that God didn't hear you.. it's something to do you with YOU the person. Is there something that you have said to someone, and that person is holding onto it negatively? Are you grudging against someone else? Have you not repented over something you did a while ago and you didn't think God will know about it?

It's always good to check ourselves. I'm starting to do that regularly myself. Even the things we say, if we're not careful, it will cause God to delay our answers.. because God searches our heart before he releases. If he can see that there is still a little bitterness, or a little hatred or something that doesn't qualify for him to bless us.. he will give it to someone who is ready.

Really, we don't even qualify to call on God, but because of his grace, because of the sacrifice his son Jesus made...

Hm.

My brain has been on overdrive lately... I will blog more..

Good night

God bless x

We are in the last days...

Scripture says in 2 Timothy 3:

'1 But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. 2People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, 4treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God— 5having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with them.

6They are the kind who worm their way into homes and gain control over weak-willed women, who are loaded down with sins and are swayed by all kinds of evil desires, 7always learning but never able to acknowledge the truth. 8Just as Jannes and Jambres opposed Moses, so also these men oppose the truth—men of depraved minds, who, as far as the faith is concerned, are rejected. 9But they will not get very far because, as in the case of those men, their folly will be clear to everyone.'

It's as clear as that.

The fact that these riots are taking place now, it's just a confirmation of God's word. God's word, is life and truth.

I'm not scared at all, but I am shocked at the EXTENT of this madness. There is actually no motive to why this is taking place.. it's all down to opportunistic tendencies. And that's the way of the devil.. the devil always finds ways to get an opportunity and run with it.

God will protect and keep his children, I know that-- but wow. This madness needs to cease.

Deep thought..

I have officially deemed myself the serial thinker.
My mind likes to drift to places..

Just now.. my mind has been drifting.

You know how you watch movies or you see television shows and they say that 'You don't really know a person' yet they've known that particular person for years?

Just been thinking, no one really knows WHO you really are. Yeah, they have an idea of your personality and your favourite things, favourite colours and all of that.. but they don't know YOU. They don't know you from within.

That's where God comes in.

But hold on, where I'm getting at is... your innermost thoughts.. and who you truly are.. no one really sees, because we hide behind masks and fake emotions to cover up who we really are.

But why do we do that?
Is it because if we lower that barrier, we will feel vulnerable? We will feel so much on show of our true selves?

It has nothing to do about being fake, it's more of a protection thing so that we don't get hurt?

Because I know my own family doesn't know me entirely.. the only person who truly knows is God because he's the one who created me.

My mind is drifting... and my heart is speaking. I'll take notes.

God bless
x

Being Grateful

Just to appreciate everything you have.

What I've noticed about myself and people around me is that sometimes we do forget the things that we've obtained. But to be honest we're human beings, which is not an excuse but we do tend to forget particular things until we are reminded.

That's why it's always good to reflect.

Even being grateful for seeing today... because I always say it, there's people who have not had the privilege to see today but you have!

Just something to think about.

God bless
x

Don't worry...

As the picture states... do not worry about tomorrow...
Why are you worrying about a day that hasn't even come to existence?

Do you even know if you're going to see the next day?

Why are you worrying about things that haven't even reached yet? Scripture says, 1 Peter 5:7, 'Cast your burdens onto him, for he cares for you'

You see that? He cares for YOU. Do you know how big God is? Do you think your problems will weigh God down?

I don't think so.

He's there for you. Give it to him. Don't bottle those feelings up.

Things may seem rough now, yes, but it's only for a time. Everything in life has a time, and when the time has run out.. it goes. So don't think that problem is going to last forever, it will run its course and go.

Don't think about giving up just yet... be reminded that when you feel like giving up, it only means that your blessing is right around the corner.

Just hold on that little bit longer.

Keep going.

God bless
x

Time of reflection..

It's always good to reflect on life. Do you know why? So we don't forget all of the good things that has happened to us... we don't forget the people that helped us along the way, and most importantly we don't forget where we came from.

One thing I always say to myself is when I make it to where God wants me to be, I do not want forget who helped me along the way, and I really don't want to forget where I came from.

You see, with God.. when he takes you somewhere, he always takes you from somewhere low and brings you up. That's so we will appreciate it more when we get there. But then we have to be careful because that's where pride and ego can set in and we not only forget where we came from, but we become arrogant and we let it all get to our heads. That's what I DON'T want. EVER.

Because.. the same thing God gave to you, he can easily take it away, like *snaps fingers* that.

That's why it's so important to be humble.. to be humble just means to take what is given to you. To bring yourself down.. your pride, your so called knowledge (truly, our knowledge comes from above) and let God do it. Humbleness attracts success.. it attracts more blessing than you could ever imagine.

That's why where you start from is never bright, it's always from a dark grim place.. and then God shows up and brings you to a place that he's planned for you.
That's how God works... he comes to a place that is mash up.. a place where everything looks hopeless, and he glorifies himself.

How else would you know he's God?

If God comes when everything is fine, how would you know if it was him doing anything? He works in ways we could NEVER imagine.

So when you are expecting something from God.. keep your eyes peeled because he doesn't come the way that you are expecting him to come.

But.. I always reflect, I'm a serial reflector/thinker.. and I can't help but to think about everything that has happened to me and how I've managed to survive.. how I've managed to keep it together.. it's all down to God.

So... definitely take time to reflect on your life.. and just know that God is backing you in everything. Always invite him in your life.. in your day, in your morning, when you're walking... he wants you to. He wants to talk to you, hear him out.

It's something else.

God bless
x

For the Ladies...

^^This picture is currently on my Blackberry Messenger, and it has so many connotations.

Lets state what's in the picture: A woman who is on her knees with the world on her shoulders.

Women... we are all strong. In whatever aspect, we are strong. The 'world' is everything we experience in life. But the fact that she is on her knees and still managing to hold the world on her shoulders, we are all stronger than we ought to believe. Twists, turns and struggles may come our way, but at the end of it all, we still manage to keep it on our shoulders.

Men indeed need a woman to back them... they can't handle a lot on their own, and it's because they need a strength of a woman. Men are physically and mentally strong but women have a strength that cannot be measured. It's not a sexist thing, it's what I've witnessed, and also I've come to find out through my own personal experiences.

That's why it says in Genesis 2:23

'The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man'

A man and a woman are cut from the same mould, but there are strengths that a woman has that a man doesn't. There has to be a balance!

What I'm trying to say is, Women.. we do a lot; and I don't think none of us realise how much we take on board until we sit down and reflect!
Just because you're emotional doesn't mean you are weak. It means you can express yourself without any shame.

Imagine: carrying the entire world on our shoulders? And we make it look so easy, when it is not!
Do not be discouraged if things aren't going the way it ought to... it's just a test of our strength, to see how long we can endure. We go through so much pain, emotional damage, a lot of things that we may think we could never get through..

But we do.

No one said life was going to be easy, so really all we can do is to persevere. Despite all of the things that go on in our families, in our lives, whatever the case maybe.. we still find a way to manage.

Come on.
You are strong.

God bless
x

It's August!

A new month. A new thing that God will do.

I know I haven't updated, and that's all on my part.
Life is so demanding... and my spiritual father always says something, 'We have given the power to make wealth' God gives us power and authority to do what we couldn't do. We have the POWER to CREATE.

Are you still with me here?

God is not a magician. You don't just sit there and wait for God to come down from the clouds before you do something. God is a spirit. He uses US as his vessels for what he wants to do for this world to be what he wants it to be.
So WE have to put the work in; that's why scripture says 'I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me'

So.. whatever you are seeking for. GO FOR IT. God has given us the power to do it. Don't just sit there and expect God to come.

God does not come the way we are expecting. God can manifest himself through a baby, a dog, a toddler.. anything! You don't know, that's why it's never good to expect. Just have belief and faith.

Scripture also says, 'We walk by faith, not by sight' 2 Corinthians 5:7

That means, the things that you are praying for.. the things that have been declared over your life.. you have to have FAITH and believe so that it comes to pass. Lets say 'Faith' is our spiritual sight. Do you know how powerful your faith can be once you build it up?

Even me.. I'm getting to a level.. but my faith is not up there just yet. I'll admit, sometimes it sways, and I do get a bit double minded, and that's never good. But God is helping my slowly. When your faith sways too much.. BUILD IT UP.

How?

Encourage yourself in the word of God.
Find yourself a spiritual father/mother
PRAY

Prayer is key. It helps a lot. God has answered a lot of my prayers and I get so marveled. He HEARS ME! If that doesn't build up your faith... I dunno what will.

But that's all for now. I gots so many other things to write; but I promise I'll update tomorrow or even this evening...

God bless
x

What do you do...

to show someone that you really care?

Actions speak louder; which is what they all say, but what if you've done enough actions.. do you think that they would have caught on and realised?

You know when you just wanna prove to someone that you care, rather just telling the person, 'I care about you' and not doing anything?

When you just do those little things that they don't expect... it tells them a lot.

I dunno.

Just late night babblings.

I'm on holiday so more thought provoking blogs soon come.

God bless
x

Haven't blogged...

I know!

Grr, I don't want this to become a growing trend!

It's just when I get home from work I'm so tired.. and I just want to sleep and blah blah.

Anyway!

I'm gonna be real.

What if the person you're meant to be with is right in front of you and YOU know it, but that person doesn't?

What do you do?

I'm not sure if I'm in that kind of situation, I could be getting way ahead of myself... but it's just a thought.

I officially finish for the holidays on the 19th of this month. So it's drawing nearer. I'll them have more thought provoking things to say, because right now I am so frazzled.

God bless
x

23

Today is my birthday!

...and it finishes in approx 9 minutes :(

But I'm really overwhelmed; over 70 people posted messages on my facebook; I don't think I've ever had that number before?!

But I thank God he's added another year onto my life... so lets see what he has in store...

God bless

x

New month, first Sunday..

My eyelids are heavy..

So.. I just want to say thank you LORD.


God bless
x

'Call me Crazy...'

Wow.


I only realised the other day that I haven't updated for sometime now!

It was a beyond hectic day last week.. and I've just been really tired, and trying to catch up on rest.

But today, let me tell you what happened.

So.

I was SUPPOSED to have been helping someone out, and he cancelled, so I travelled to an area for no reason.

Going back home now; I'm at the train station and this Jamaican dude is coming to me and says 'I'm taking you with me, and you're never going home again'

What in the world...?

I said to the guy, 'You need to go home and sleep'
And then the guy tries to reach out for my arm to take me

I raised my voice and went, 'Go get on your train and GO HOME.'
And he ran to the train.

That left me FUMING. If I wasn't careful I would have given the guy some slap.
But then again.. it all goes back to not fighting against flesh and blood... it's all biblical.

Eh.

It was just really weird how it happened.
And that just again confirms that there are things in this world.

But anyway.
I got home safe..
I thank God.

End of
God bless
x

What a long day.

I've hurt my right side, so doing some stuff today was a weeny bit difficult.. all achy and what not, but I thank God that I was able to endure through the day!

Today was an alright day, actually. It went by relatively quickly.. and yeah, there was a lot to be done.

Just can't wait for Friday.

Once again, since I had some long bus journeys, it caused me to think about a couple of things, and... yeah. Life.. is something.

But have a think of this quote..

"A friend is one who believes in you, when you have ceased to believe in yourself"

God bless
x

Confirmation

For a while now, I was wondering if my mother would ever visit me in my dreams..

I'm going a little spiritual here, so if you get lost on the way.. well, you do.

I had a dream/vision a couple of days ago and I saw her-- and prior to that I was talking to one of my dear brothers on BBM once again about making her proud and what not.. and what I saw is my mother was looking down at me like how you look into a well, and she was just looking and smiling; she wasn't saying anything. She looked so well, she looked like how she did when she was 40.. before all of the sickness started. She looked so happy.

I know she's resting.. and I know now she must be happy and I am making her proud.

x

In the eyes of God...

We are good.

He has created us in his own image and likeness. I was just thinking to myself this morning when I was getting ready for church, if God has made us in his own likeness, does that include our personalities? Our personalities is what differentiates us, yes, but there must be some of that in God..?

It was just a thought.

But where I'm getting at is, God has created us in a way, and has marked us in a way where he will know it's us.
Like... let's say you have a stammer, what you think is a 'deficiency' or something that is a downfall to you, in God's eyes, that's how he locates you.
God KNOWS us... he is the one that intricately and intimately made who we are..

And the way God sees us and the way man (women and men) see us are completely different. Someone may see us as.. whatever, but God sees us in a way we can ever imagine.

God has destined us for something... and that something is what we are going to discover in this journey of life...

Got a lot on my mind.. thinking about so much.. my heart is racing and God knows why.

He is my all.

God bless
x

Just one of those days..

You know when you have one of those days where everything just goes wrong... and better yet, you wake up in an indescribable mood?

Today, it was raining... and I really hope that my mood had nothing to do with it.. but I was just in some... sad/mellow/melancholic/passive I don't even know kind of mood. The day just dragged... and almost everything was going wrong..

Yeah.

So firstly, I'm glad the day is over. Because believe it or not, today can never come back.. once it's gone, it's gone. Unless you have a magical remote like in 'Click' where you can rewind and fast forward your life..

OTHERWISE! Never coming back.

Anyway.

Been thinking about things.. that I OVER think about and I don't even feel like bringing it back up again.

Just did my bit of 60 second writing.. it's really helpful.
Part of the whole thinking is my writing... I'm writing.. but not writing like what I wanna write if that makes sense? I'm writing more articles than stories.. and I have ideas.. but when I actually DO get time, I don't do it?

Just need to discipline myself.. time is ticking.

Sheesh.

Regardless of all my moaning.. I thank God. He's sustained me. I'm still here. I'm alive.

Thank you God...

x

Fresh. Renewed.

Every week is a new chance..

But today in particular, I feel so different-- so free---so renewed.

It's a nice feeling and I pray it stays and never leaves.

But today has been really good. The day was very productive.. one thing I've realised is... no matter what, we complain.

We have food. Yes. But if the food is 'different' we comment on it, and moan. We want it to be warm. Yes. If it gets hot, we complain. If it rains, we complain.

It's... just.. funny.

LIFE is funny.

Really.. I'm just glad I'm alive. Nowadays I don't take being here for granted anymore because it can be taken in snap.

I know I'm here to do something great...
And so are you.. :)

Night Night
God bless

x

What a day it has been!

You know.. everything that happens has been planned by God already.. we just need to reach that day in order to experience what's in store.

Life is so funny...

I don't have much to say, but today has just been an awesome day... and God is just wonderful.

God bless
x

Impact

I went to an event today, and there was a short exhortation, and the content of it was so emosh it actually got me thinking. This is the second time I'm writing about it, (I wrote it on my FB, but I'm going to write it in more depth here)

The guy that was speaking was speaking about 'Generational Impact', and said "Your life must have an impact' And it made me think, 'Have I impacted anyone?'

Because the reason why we are living is NOT in vain, we are not living for ourselves, but we are living for others, and in my case, I'm living for Jesus.

Our lives should be able to impact or influence someone else. That's why when we go through things, we shouldn't just take them as tragedies or things that we can never get out of.. but they are more like chapters in a story that people are meant to have knowledge of.

Because you know, not everyone is supposed to go through things. If we've gone through, we have the power and the knowledge to not allow someone else to go through what we did.

That's all part of impacting someone.
Helping
Supporting
Mentoring

Whatever the case maybe, as long as you've touched the life of that person... they can never forget about you.

And that's another thing, so many people gathered to appreciate this one person on his birthday, and it's like, that is such an honour, to have people come and speak good about you-- and how you've touched their lives.

All glory goes to God because it's God that is using us-- and the fact we have touched lives like that--- wow.

But yeah, just been reflecting since then and it really makes me think.. even if I have impacted someone, there are still people out there that need an encouraging word, a hug, a sympathetic ear...

Why can't you be that person?

Anywho..

God bless
x

Internal happiness..

You know when just the little things in life cause you to just feel so happy inside of you?
It doesn't necessarily have to be something someone says, but just seeing someone that you care about, a hug, a smile, a kind gesture.. just those things that make you feel so wiggly inside.

Wiggly in a good way of course!

The whole 'action speak louder than words' montage comes into play, but today just having people around that care about you is enough.

It's a beautiful thing.

Just felt like sharing!

Back to work this week... holiday time again in July.

I'll live. :)

God bless x

It's June!

Was meant to blog yesterday... and tiredness completely took over.

Anyway, on the fifth of this month it will be literally a month until my birthday.

Oh my gosh!

Getting 'maturer'

lol.

But everyday I have to thank God.. because when we're asleep, we are completely unaware with what's going on around us.. what's going on generally.. because we're not awake.
But God... being our helper, protector, keeper.. he keeps us until the day breaks. And if that's not enough to thank God.. then I dunno what is.

There's so much going on that people are unaware of in the world, and in people's lives... but by the time we're aware of it, it's too late..

Time to open our eyes ay?

Just a thought.

God bless (May blog later) x

A writer's point of view..

So bought some stationary... I love it. I get so excited when I get new notebooks and pens and such..

Yeah... I made today my 'writing day' but didn't write that much to be honest. Maybe I need to make it a writing week..

Anyway.

Again... have been thinking..
I was talking to one of my dear brothers on BBM and I was in such a mood of release, I made it known to him about how I thank God for my job because it was one of the things my mother knew before she died.

And for me, or TO me.. I think it made her go in peace at least knowing that I wasn't going to struggle. Because I know my mom and I know that's the last thing she wanted for her children is to struggle.

I dunno... but she died the same day when I got the news of my new job. So... at least she heard some good news.

I miss her. But I know she's resting.

And it really makes you think like, when you lose someone is that when you start to appreciate them? It should start from now--but that's human nature I guess?

But... I always appreciated her, no matter what. Even though I never mentioned it all the time, I did. And I know she knows.

Just some thoughts...

Gonna probably write a bit more actually.

Night night

God bless x

Just a release

Had a busy couple of days, and getting home really late.. that's why I haven't blogged.

But just been reflecting on my life.

Like, I really believe we all need a time where we can just sit down and reflect on what we've done so far, and what we aim to do, and if what we're doing is having an effect onother people.

I was just thinking about myself and what I've done so far.. if I'm impacted or changed someone's life in anyway.. if my motives are correct, and I'm not just thinking about myself, but I'm thinking of other people..

Just loads of stuff.

Because in life, it's always good to be a selfless person, because when you're selfish, in my opinion it's an ugly trait to have, and I think it makes you ugly.. whatever you are inside shows outwardly.

But anyway.. I need to sleep.

God bless x

Get the HAIL outta here!

My goodness gracious-- didn't get the chance to blog yesterday because I got home ultra late from church...

But the storms yesterday were complete and utter madness. Even WITH an umbrella I still got drenched!

I reckon it's the rain built up over all of these months.. because it hasn't rained for I think 2 months? It hasn't rained properly anyway.

The rain quickly changed to pelting hail, and it was madness!
I was just surprised.. I like rain, but not getting caught in it.

Anyway... that was yesterday, and it's now today.

May not get to blog later... so until tomorrow.

God bless
x

So.. this is a must have..

So.. went into Superdrug today and got me one of these!

Was so excited.. must have been the best card I've ever gotten, and it doubles as a mirror.

It's just really cool.

I wonder who thinks up the ideas for these kinds of things?

Anyway, just thought I'd share that with you guys.

Until next time.

God bless x

Fatigue

I haven't blogged since Sunday?

Wow.

Let me just throw this out there, but when you're tired, do you notice that you start to notice intricate things? Like things you wouldn't usually pick up on if you had energy?

Like if you sit down quietly and listen to people talking.. you'd start to pick on stuff.. I can't describe it.

I think I just need to sleep.

Friday is approaching and more thought provoking blogs too...

#random

God bless xx

PS.. Don't forget to VOTE for Emmanuella for Discovery of the year! www.africagospelawards.com

Being human...

We are subject to so many things.

I think the biggest thing we have to face is our emotions.

How can they be so powerful that they can actually take over you? If you get what I mean? Especially with emotions such as love and anger? How can a FEELING make you do things and afterwards, you either don't remember, or you feel really stupid after you've done them?

Emotions are natural as a human being.. and I just find it fascinating.

Yeah.

I'm tired...

Half term is approaching and I'm so happy, there's so much to be done!

One thing I'd like to say; Love yourself. Because as you love yourself, you also love God because he created you.. and God is love :)

God bless x

You just never know..

So.. awake early on this beautiful Saturday morning and I'm just thinking about how you just never know what people think of you until they say it.

And yesterday I was told I was beautiful, and a person I would have NEVER expected to tell me that, told me. I was actually astounded for a couple of seconds, and I just thought 'Wow'.

I'm still trying to get myself to take compliments because I'm so not used to it... and I don't want to take them on board and become big headed--I just go 'Thank you' and put it down.

But what I was thinking is, there's people out there who know you or don't know you (Maybe people that see you or never talk to you) But they have a thought of you. Whether it's good or bad, you don't know, but they have a thought and you will never know until they tell you.

Because you're just going around doing your thing unaware of what people have in their minds-- and it's funny because when people tell you, it's so unexpected as well!
But I guess it's a encouragement booster, to let you know that there are people who are thinking good of you, but just don't say it all the time. And it's actually better that way-- it has more meaning.

The same with God.. he has a thought about all of us, and it's always a good thought because he created us to make a difference.

I'm still surprised now.

It's funny!

Beautiful day.. enjoy the sun!

God bless x

Before it strikes twelve..

Please support and VOTE for Emmanuella!

http://www.africagospelawards.com/


And.... I really like this youtube video:



A more thought provoking blog resides tomorrow..

God bless x

Two is better than one.

Ecclesiastes 4:10

'For if they fall, one will lift up his companion'

This scripture has so many connotations. That's how awesome the word of God is.

It could mean, when someone falls down, there is someone there to lift up that person.. it could mean, when there is two people and one is discouraged.. the other friend is there to speak strength and encouragement..

It can mean a multitude of things.

But what I wanted to share with you is that anything you want to do in the world, you cannot, I repeat.. CANNOT do it alone. Yes we want to be independent, and yes we want to make a name for ourselves.. but how are we going to do that? We need someone to help us get there.

You can be full of pride and say, 'No.. I can reach it there by myself' Well honey, you're just setting yourself up for a really big fall.. and when you fall, who is going to pick you up?

You think all the people that have made it did it on their own?

I don't think so.

They had people who helped them along the way.. some came and went, and some stayed, nonetheless people came to do their part to help!

Don't feel like you can do it all on your own-- because you can't. You need that support of another person, and vice versa.

We will all get there, with the help of another person.

Yes, we will!

God bless x

All you can do is laugh

I read in the Metro today about how some quack psychologist, (he's not a quack, it's my own opinion from this theory he derived..) has now come up with this theory about how black girls are unattractive due to high levels of testosterone.

Now.

Firstly, the guy has no evidence to why that is.
Secondly, unattractive is an opinion, not a scientific hypothesis.
Thirdly... I just take it as racism. I know it exists, I'm not phased by that at all.. but to come out like that.. that's messed up.

How can you just come and say, black girls are unattractive?

The world is funny. Don't you know beauty comes from within? He's deriving from the physical.

The things in the paper make me laugh.

I'll blog again in a bit...

God bless x

This world that we live in...

This morning as I was readily getting ready for work, I heard on the radio that they were ready to halve the time rapists spend in jail if they admit that they committed the crime.

Something along those lines.

I DON'T THINK SO!

Whether they admit to it or not, they should do the full sentence for the sole fact they are subject to committing the same crime. So you're telling me when they go and rape a 14 year old, go to jail, and they admit to it instead of denying.. within the same year they'll be out again?

No. No. No. No.

I'm sorry, there's already so much paedophilia going on in the world... why do that?

And that pushes me to my next point.
God is the creator of all, right?

Well... how would we be able to differentiate good from bad unless it was put there. So when 'bad' things happen, we know they are bad. If we only saw good all the time, we wouldn't know what bad is.
Point being that life is a learning process as well as growth.
Everything in life we learn, we take on board and we use it to our strength.

So... in any bad situation, be thankful because at the end of it you've acquired strength and knowledge.

You see how God works? It's mysterious.

That's how he is.

Thoughts are quite cluttered.. I'm sleep deprived.

Night, night

God bless x

Life: Predestined?

Morpheus: Do you believe in fate, Neo?
Neo: No.
Morpheus: Why not?
Neo: Because I don't like the idea that I'm not in control of my life.

The matrix is one of my favourite movies. You know why? The way it's so ambiguous and the angle that you can relate it to isn't just one way.

I love that.

You know why I used this quote? Because of what Neo said. He said he doesn't like the idea that he's not in control of his own life.

Are you in control of your own life?

Yes, we are alive and we're living life each day, but are we actually in control? Do we know what will come out of living life? Do we even know what's going to happen tomorrow?
But truthfully, and I really believe that there is someone out there watching over us.. and guiding us.

I don't care how independent you are, and how much you've planned... sometimes things don't go according to plan, despite being 'independent' we all need help in some point in our lives.. we can't do everything alone, you know?

But don't you think life is more than this? That there is something you've been created to do.. yes you have your own desires and such.. but in a way your life has been written shall I say, for you?
But it's been written according to your strength, meaning what you've been destined to do.. you CAN do because it's been created for you.

I hope I haven't lost you.

My point: Life isn't just how you see it. It's for a purpose because you have something to fulfill. Whether you know or not, it's there and you need to complete it.

Just more thoughts...

God bless x

Release

You can't keep things inside for too long..

It needs to come out so your spirit is unhindered..

You know when you feel like there's a load on your back.. or your heart is heavy? or even your chest feels like there is a load on it? I dunno if anyone has experienced these things.. but you're just lodging up your spirit with unnecessary worries and anchors that prevent you from moving up..

Just open your mouth.. and speak to God.. he knows what's best.

Yes. He does.

Last blog of the night..

God bless x

There's no need...

I've been saying this time and time and again, and I won't stop until it's imprinted in someone's mind:

You do not need to tell everyone about your plans and dreams.

You know why? Because believe it or not, there are people out there who are seeking for your downfall. Oh yes.
I don't know why, but there's people out there, where they hear something good is happening to someone, they want to destroy it.

You can speak to people, but just be careful about what you say. Yes, there are people out there who are genuinely happy for you, but you don't know what they are planning in their minds.

I'm just saying the real stuff; because I had it in my mind that everyone likes me.. but I quickly found out that is a lie! Everyone will not like you, for what reason, I do not know.

But all I'm saying is, people can take it how it is, I call it being selective. You have the choice to say what you want, you don't have to expose your whole life to someone because then they have something to grasp onto.

Spiritually speaking, if someone has something to use against you, they can, and they can grasp onto your progress, onto anything and you'll notice that your life isn't going the way it should.

Scripture says: James 1:19 'My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry'
Meaning... be a good listener, and THINK before you speak.

It's a skill that is vital.. and when you grasp it, you can never go wrong.

#wisdom

God bless x

Just a realisation..

Last thought/blog of the night:
If you meet someone who has a similar passion or desire as you; don't feel the need to compete..

Because you have something IN you that is completely different from them. Everyone was created differently..

There might be a particular talent or skill that is in you that that other person will not have.
There's so many writers and actors and social workers and teachers and the list can go on and on, but you see each and every one of them is not the same, and even if they appear to be, they are different in the way they execute whatever they are doing.

None of us are the same, we are all different.

Embrace what you have and run with it.. you don't know where it can take you...

#thought

God bless x

Patience

It's a good virtue to harbour..

Was taught about patience in depth today at church.. and it was mind blowing. Patience is always needed because when you rush you miss the mark..

Take a look at it like this: When you're in a race, it's not how fast you can run, because you will tire quickly... but instead you're running at a steady pace, not paying attention to what's going on around you, but focusing on making the finish line.. which is your destination.

You have to be patient.. the finish line has not yet approached, so keep on running that race...

When you're patient.. you don't need to be anxious.
When you're patient you'll get what you rightfully deserve rather than some rubbish that you weren't even meant to have..

There are some things that you are expecting, but they won't fall in your lap just like that.. you have to be patient and wait for it to come at the right time..

That's how God works.

Being patient is difficult when you're really expecting something from God, or from anyone.. but just WAIT, it will come at the right time...

Have a good night.

God bless x

Easy like Sunday morning...

Just woken up my dear readers...

Couldn't help but come on my blog.

How I woke up was beautiful.. I just woke up... and light was just shining through my window. It was so comforting. I don't know how to describe it.

But I needed that sleep.. despite going to sleep around 12:30 am *bbm straight face* I know... upon all I did the day before, the least I could do for myself was go to sleep early!
I'm always up at 11, 12... I can't go to sleep at 9 anymore.. that's way too early for me!
But anyway! I feel the aches and pains of what I did the day before, but all glory goes to my father because I'm alive to see this day!

It's also an encouragement because that means he still has something to do with me, and with YOU reading this.

Just believe.

Have a wonderful day!

God bless x

Dear God....

Literally, my last post of the night. [Honestly.]

God...

Within me, I have a sense of urgency, of what.. I do not know. I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow because I'm not you. But I feel.. like something good is going to happen... but then my mind decides to try and uproot that thought and plant something stupidly negative..

Like for about a week, nearing to two, I was seriously at peace within myself. Despite everything not being the way it should, [and you know why of course] I was just content. But then something happened... and I felt all uneasy within my spirit again.

Why does that happen... and I want that peace again. I HAVE that peace again. I believe in you... because really, I don't have anyone else, if I look left, or right no one is there. So the only way is up.

To you.

I just wanted to say thank you... I never feel like that is enough, but I don't know what else to say.. it's like anything else is minuscule to what you do for me!

Thank you.

So much.

I love you.

Diana x

So what's the dealio?

Life is a funny little thing isn't it?

There is more to life than what meets the eye, and the part of life that isn't seen, do you want to see it?

Or do you want to stay ignorant and just go about life like a zombie-- waking up and doing the same routine?

Have you actually sat down and thought, 'Is there more to life than this?'
There are so many things happening that you are not aware of.

Take it like this, you know when you--lets say, get a new car, or get a new bag... and all of a sudden you start seeing that car or that bag or piece of clothing everywhere.. it was always there, but you just weren't AWARE that it was there.

Just like this life.. there are things that are there, but until we will become aware of what's going on around us, we won't see it.

Life is a funny little thing, I tells ya. But it all depends on what you want to know and see.

#choice.

Until next time...

God bless x

Wisdom

If Jada Pinkett didn't marry him, and I got to meet him.. I would have grabbed him. #honest

His wisdom is something else, and I just love his outlook on life.

Have a listen..

Be encouraged!

Yeah... so I can't help but to write another one.

So... you're in your house, you're in your car, you're on the bus.. thinking..
What are you thinking?

Why am I even here?
I'm useless...
What am I meant to be doing in my life?
No one needs me.. no one loves me..

Hold up one coller pickin' minute!

Firstly, why are you allowing negative thoughts to cloud your mind?

Why are you here?

You have been chosen by God to fulfil a purpose he has destined for YOU. He needs YOU in order for a piece of his plan to be complete.

You are NOT useless.. you are useful, you know why? Because God has put something in you that no one else has because he made you that way.. there is a skill, a talent you have that you need to embrace and use for good.


What you're meant to be doing.. everyone has a desire and aspiration right? Whatever yours is, take a look and see if it doesn't only benefit you, but it will benefit and effect a multitude of people.. you are here because you're meant to make a change for the greater good!

Everyone needs you and GOD loves you.
I know you probably hear it all the time but if you take a minute and sit down... everyday you wake up intact. Everyday you go out into the world and you are sustained... anything could happen to you. You hear stories on the news about people being kidnapped and abducted and all sorts of horror stories... but you manage to go and come back and nothing ever happens to you. Somebody somewhere is watching out for you.
Everyone does need you.. if it's not the people you know, it's the people you don't know. Oh yes, best believe honey! Mhmm! Get to know..

Just know.. you weren't made in vain and that there is something that God needs you for.
Let him in and see. It'll be a good one. Your life will never be the same. My life surely isn't!

#life

God bless x

Visualized Reality: The meaning behind the name

Ok. So I've decided to write just one more!

I'd like to break down the meaning of my blog name.. It came to me in seconds, but it basically means this:

Reality is what we see around us right? [That's what we want to believe..] But someone must have visualized what the world would be like in order to create it, so again, this blog is about everything in I see in this 'visualized reality' also known as the world.

#deep

Yeah, just felt like elaborating.
Hope you're enjoying the nice weather!

God bless x

So, I'm just full of thoughts

I think this will be the last one for the day!

Every time I commute to work and back, I observe people. Instinctively I judge people... because I'm a human.
Even though who am I even to judge?

But, then it came to me, if I'm observing these people and judging them inwardly like this, aren't they most probably doing the same to me?

And when I heard a message that said 'God is the only judge' I mean, when I see people smoking, and wearing weird clothing, I ask myself, Why would they do that? And you know how you see people smoking, and it doesn't even look like that cigarette should be prodded in their two fingers of theirs?
But one day I actually rebuked my own self, because I shouldn't be doing that!

You just have to leave people to do what they have to do. All you can do is speak words, and possibly one day if they have taken the word, it will manifest in their lives positively.

But when you're in a flesh container, you're subjected to doing things to the flesh. It's not an excuse, but it's reality.

But yeah, maybe people are doing the same to me, but I know that it's wrong to do that, and I just decided to write this down because I've found myself doing it and really I should be looking at myself and not other people. When you don't want to outline your mistakes or wrongdoings you point the finger on other people when you should really be taking it upon yourself...

When you set yourself straight, you don't have a problem!

So please... all of those people that I judged... I'm sorry, and God, forgive me!

You know the power we have is to forgive... if someone has done something to you.. forgive them.. because holding onto grudges delays your progression...

#thoughts

Until next time..

God bless x

I got my mind made up!

I'm gonna lift up anyone that I get connected to!

I'm sorry, but I do not understand, sorry to say, the black community and why the mentality is so messed up!

#honestly

How come when we see our own people, we're ashamed to even be in the same room as them? How come when someone is rising up, they want to pull them down?

I don't understand, we are not unified.. and we are not together, so how else are we gonna all make it?

Why?

Our mindset just needs to change... because we are so talented and so creative, so why are we destroying ourselves?

And don't you think when you make a decision to just encourage somebody, uplift somebody that we won't all be uplifted?

I always say whoever has the energy to plan, and gossip to destroy someone does not have anything to do, and that is just pointless.

We were created to make a change.. not to destroy.

#thought

God bless x

The belief of Change

This is one of the reasons why I decided to change my blog:

The blog rolled back to 2008, and back then I was NOT saved... I got saved in 2009.. and the blog had me saying some language that I can't even handle if I hear someone else saying it, let alone myself.

It's because I've been renewed.

It's not like I just woke up one day and said, 'I'm going to stop doing this, doing that' It's the holy spirit that does the work. The only thing that is on my part is the decision to want to change.

But it's not a good look to have cussing on there and all sorts when that's not a part of me anymore.

And plus, besides my idle thoughts.. I want to use this blog as an encouragement, and to share thoughts on particular subjects I've come across.. seen.. discussed.. whatever.

Change is always good.. especially when it benefits people around you too. Because when you're associated with people, you may not realise it, but some people look up to you and are influenced BY you, so when they see that you've changed, it will encourage them to make a few changes... it's all part of lifting people up.

#change

God bless x

Moving on, and moving up

Firstly.. this new blog had a mishap.. I actually created it yesterday and something happened to blogger and it went down.. it's back up now and my old blog that I do not want to see had magically shown up again?!

So I created this blog again, so hah!

Anyway *ahem*

Welcome. Welcome to MY world.. the place where I can get away..

I had a thought yesterday on my way to work:

Our bodies are flesh, right? But inside of us, harbours a spirit. That's the spirit of God. God has placed his spirit into us, but in Galatians 5:17 it says 'For the flesh lusts against the spirit and the spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things you wish'
So God has purposely put HIS spirit into a container that is against the wants of what our spirit wants? So that we don't do what we actually want to do? [And why I say 'container' has no relevance to food, but to the fact that when you put something in a container, it's to protect, to preserve it right? So God has put his spirit in a container, known as the flesh to preserve it..] Because God obviously can't just walk amongst the earth.. he's a spirit, so how else is he going to be on earth again unless he's in all of us?

Wow.

So for example, when [your flesh] desires to do something against your spirit (even though it's God spirit, he has placed it in US), so lets say you just feel to go out clubbing, but then something within you actually stops you.. that something is your spirit because it doesn't want you to do that.

But then wouldn't it depend on how strong you are in the spirit to overcome the temptation of flesh? Because they are against each other, they are forever conflicting right? Because I've even had times where I've given into the lusts of the flesh-- and even so, it was in the plan of God.
And that's another thing, everything that happens, even the 'bad' things, it's all part of God's plan.. it may not seem like it at the time, but when you get past it and see it from a different perspective.. you then go 'Oh...'
Haven't you had a time where you've really wanted to do something so bad, something 'just once' but then you don't end up doing it?

The bible is a deep book.
This was just a thought I had on my way to work; my mind tends to race at an uncountable speed..

#thoughts

God bless x