Wednesday 26 October 2016

Motherhood

As I stare at this little bundle of joy.. I know God's plan for my life is continuing to unfold and will only get better.

I am a mother.
At 28 years old-- I would have never imagined that I would have a child-- it was a desire that I had, but it wasn't something that I was focused on.
But God being God.. and his humour-- I was blessed with a child and endured the 9 months of pregnancy.

Everyone has their own experience with pregnancy-- But God has been so good to me. My pregnancy wasn't too difficult and there were no complications until the very end-- but even the 'complications' weren't complications!
My bundle of joy came at 39 weeks, healthy and happy.

But now the real journey begins-- learning and knowing how to raise this child!
I'm learning new things everyday-- and as much as this is a new experience for me-- I'm taking it all in my stride.
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On the 15th of October 2016-- a gift that I never thought would be given to me; was placed in my hands, crying, with his big eyes looking directly into mine. Head full of hair, skin as light as mine-- and so beautiful. I couldn't believe that I had him growing inside of me all of this time-- the little kicks, the hiccups, my belly slowly expanding to accommodate for his size. I didn't get the typical pregnancy symptoms that everyone is familiar with-- call me lucky lol

What an experience!

From my first scan I was dying to know what he would look like-- would he have a lot of hair? Who would he resemble? Whose nose would he have? What colour eyes would he have? Even the day I found out he was a 'he' was another day of joy for me.
Throughout the 9 months it didn't come into my mind that there is a little person that will be coming out of me-- it doesn't really enter your mind until closer to the time-- but rather you're literally focusing on bonding with the life that is growing inside of you.
It's amazing how much love resonates within you with someone that you have yet to meet. You sit there in amazement as how much you cannot wait to meet this small person and see their little hands and their little feet... it's such a beautiful feeling.

The moment he came out of me and was placed on my chest, him wiggling his legs and feet, getting used to my smell-- I stroked his arms and his little fingers-- so delicate and tiny-- his little rhythmic crying-- getting used to the world outside of the womb...

It's all very surreal.
A lot of people told me that I will be a good mother-- I look at his little face... and a little smile creeps up on his face-- looking so happy-- I pray to God I will be a good mother to this gift from God.

It's all very surreal-- this is my phrase because I just can't believe it. But God knows why he has given him to me to take care of--- he knows I am capable and I can only pray for his strength and guidance.

Motherhood isn't easy-- but it's worth every single moment.